| Sailor Moon Says! |
| Season 1 |
| (Episodes 17 to 21) |
| Welcome to Sailor Moon Says: Season 1! These are the oldest episodes of "Sailor Moon Says!" They contain only a select few heads, and don't really have an on-going plot. But I hope you enjoy them despite these facts! Because of the shorter episode lengths, I've condensed eight onto a page. I also didn't attach episode titles until long after the episodes' original airings. This page contains episodes seventeen through twenty-one. Now run away. | ||
| Starring... | ||||||
|
|
|
|
|
||
| Lita | Amy | Serena | Raye | Mina | ||
|
|
|
|
|||
| Molly | Luna | Alan | Melvin | |||
| Episode 17: "Judging Amy" | ||
Hello, people. Sailor Moon could not be present today, because she's tied up at the moment. Heh-heh. Oh, that wasn't me "heh-heh"ing. Because, um, I haven't done anything to cackle about. I'm completely inncoent!
Domestic case: "Tied Up." The plaintiff is Luna, and the defendant is Raye Hino. All rise. I call this court in session. Raye Hino, how do you plead?
Guilty.
Huh?
*Gasp*
Whew!
*Gasp*
Yes!
Nooo!
*Pplltt* Oh, excuse me!
Eeeewwwww!
Well, back on subject... Raye Hino, did you indeed plead guilty?
Oops! I havn't been getting much sleep lately. I mean, I plead not guilty, your honor.
Nooo!
Yes!
Don't you dare "your honor" me!
Isn't she supposed to say that?
I'm not sure... I'll ask. Amy, isn't she supposed to say that?
Right. Just a little judicial humor there!
*Groan*
You don't like my jokes? Guilty! Guilty! Two years salt mining!
Yes!
Nooo!
I haven't presented my case yet, your honor!
Not you, those two girls! Take them away, guards!!
Nooo!
Yes!
Let us go!
Yeah, and maybe that'll prevent you from getting a knuckle sandwhich from her?
Or maybe these handcuffs will too..
I call my first witness to the stand: Raye Hino!
Duh-duh-duuuh!!
That is the worst private eye melodramatic music I've heard!
Wanna make somethin' of it?
Yeah, wimp!
*POW!* He's out cold!
Hunny bunny! What have you done to him?
I will not have any of that in my courtroom! Two years in the salt mine!
No fair!
Why are you sticking up for him? I do not want people out cold on this clean floor! Take him to the salt mine!
Heh-heh!
Raye, why haven't you been getting much sleep lately?
Because Serena's such--
Aha!
She is not a ha! No matter how much I hate her, I'd never call her that!
Duh-duh-duuuh!!
Oh, the music! Nevermind what I just said... I was being delirious.
Stop the music, Alan; it is interfering.
But--
*Gasp* I will not tolerate such language in my courtroom! I sentence you to two years salt mining!
*Sigh* Take me away, guards!
Oh, no! He'll be able to attack Melvin if they're both in the salt mine! Amy, please either take Melvin or Alan out the salt mine!
Under-mining my authority? How dare you? Two years in the salt mine!
Nooo!
Yes!
How can you take enjoyment in her discipline? I sentence the cat to two years in the salt mine!
That's even longer in cat years!
That's too bad! Guards, take her away! I find Raye Hino guilty of not telling the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth! Take her away as well, guards! Two years salt mining!
You're right, Gemini6Ice! I sentence myself for two years in the salt mine for reckless sentencing! Guards, capture me, while I try to flee from the court! Eeeeeeee!!
Sailor Moon Says: When am I going to be untied? Anybody?
|
||
| Originally aired: Saturday, June 28, 1997 |
| Episode 18: "Pick a Fight, Any Fight" |
|
And now, the Moonlight Knight Club is proud to present... Alan and the Cardigans!!!
Thank you, thank you, everybody!
Ready?
Ready.
We love you, Alan!
We love you, Molly!
I feel left out.
Dadada....
Ooooohhhhh!!!!
Shut up, meatball head!
Dadada....
Why don't you, zucchini head?
That doesn't make any sense!
Dadada....
You make less sense than what I say!
Oh, yeah?
Yeah!
Oh, yeah?
Yeah!
Oh, yeah?
Yeah!
Hold up, girls! Adoring fans, are you fighting over me again?
Oh, shut up!
I didn't get a chance to sing!
Nya-nya-nya!
I still feel left out...
Moon Crystal Power!!!
Mars Star Power!!!
Can't we have just one Sailor Moon Says without a fight?
No!
That was a rhetorical question...
Mars, Celestial Fire, Surround!!
Missed me, match girl!
My guitar!
Oops! Sorry 'bout that!
Sailor Mars is in trouble!
You'll pay for that!
Eeeek!!
Moon, Tiara, Magic!
Hit Alan! Eeek!
My keyboard!
Uh-oh...
Sailor Moon, Molly's behind you! Haha!
Molly, Star, Power!!
Why am I always left out?
Melvin, Monkey Suit, Power!!
Come back here, you arsonist!
Eeeek!! Get him away from me!
Let me bop you on the head you frisbee-maniac!
IIIeeyyykk!!
What kind of scream is that?
Melvin, Gas, Explode!!
My lunch! Come here, dork!
I bet you don't feel left out anymore!! Can't catch me! Hahaha!
Why is she chasing my Melvin! Come back here, Mina!
Whew!
Wait! Why are you chasing after her? We're a band! Stop it I say!
He stopped chasing me!
Alan! Wait'll you hear what Melvin did! He is such a jerk! Alan! Stop running away from me!!
I'm safe!
Molly!
Mina!
Alan!
Sailor Moon Says: Alan's band is so immature!
Sailor Mars Says: Really! Fighting over the silliest things!
*Sigh* If you girls would only take your own advice...
|
| Originally aired: Saturday, July 5, 1997 |
| Episode 19: "Sailor Earth" |
 I'm lost.
Who are you?
I'm Terra! Sailor Earth!
Stop pestering her, meatball head!
B-but--
Meatball head!!
I'm so smart!
Amy! Save me! Please!
Why should I? You're stupid!!
I have an accent, and you don't, Sewena!
Let's sing that really annoying, taunting song!
I don't think I know a really annoying, taunting song!
Sure you do! It goes like this: Nya nya nya nya nya nya na! Nya nya nya nya nya nya na!
I cook! A lot! Serena eats! A lot!
Why are you all being so mean to me? Whaaa!!!
Awwww, now Serena's crying! (Baby!!)
Haw-haw!
She can't even sing!
This has to be a nightmare! Wake up, Serena!
She hates milk!
I'll pinch myself! Whoa! It was a nightmare!
I think I'm on the wrong web site...
Sailor Moon Says: Noooooooooooooo!!!
|
| Originally aired: Saturday, July 12, 1997 |
| Episode 20: "Sailor Rangers 2" | |||
Countries are everywhere!
Right! I bet there's no more than ten acres of land on this planet that's not part of a country!
Which planet? Venus or Earth?
What do you think?
She doesn't!
What?
Nevermind!
Think!
Okay, I'll try to... Ow! Waaaahhh! Now my head hurts!
*Sigh*
Let's try that Turbo Scouts thing again!
Mars Lightning Turbo Power!!
Jupiter Thunder Turbo Power!!
Mercury Blaster Turbo Power!!
Moon Chaser Turbo Power!!
Okay, stop rushing me... Go! Sailor Moon Turbo! Go! Okay? Is that good enough?
It's Amy! Um, Amy, come back later, it's kind of a mess in here...
Wait! Don't close the door! It's my... birthday...
Amy will be so surprised when she sees her surprise birthday party!
That's why they call it a surprise party...
But it's my... birthday...
Sailor Moon Chaser Says--
Fine, then! Sailor Moon Says: Copyrights suck! Teeheehee!
Oh, I'm sure that's appropriate for our target audience!
|
|||
| Originally aired: Saturday, May 24, 1997 |
| Episode 21: "Not the Season Finale" | |
This is the season finale!
No, it's not, dimwit!
Oh, how would you know, banana-head?
Because the heading above us would say "Season Finale," not "Not the Season FInale," cabbage-nose!
Oh, you're right, spinach-ears!
Watermelon-mouth!
Pyromaniac!
Frisbee-throwing lunatic!
Shut up!
*Pbltpblt*
*Gasp*
I'm a little teacup, short and stout!
Shut up, Melvin!
The others should be here shortly; we went bowling. Well, 'cept for Alan and Mina. They're at a concert right now, so they're not coming...
Serena!
Hah, Melvin! You can't touch me! I tore the page so Gemini6Ice would have to tape it, and you can't get past it...
Hey, everyone! I bowled a strike every single time I bowled! I got a perfect score of 300!
Oh, be quiet!
You're just upset 'cause you only knocked down 5 pins the entire game!
That's not true! I knocked down over 200!
But the rest were in other lanes! The pins only count if they were knocked down in the lane from which you bowled the ball!
Leave me alone!
100 percent egotistical am I today! Yay! I'm so full of myself!
Who else could you be full of?
Good point!
Well, Serena is totally obsessed over Darien!
Are not!
And Melvin is obsessed over Serena!
Hi, Mol!
Are not!
Mol? What happened to Molly?
I dunno, what happened to her? Oh, no! Was she in a car accident? I hope my best friend's okay...
I'm obsessed over Melvin!
Really? Oh, hug me, Molly!
Sure thing!
Ouch!
They forgot about the tape!
I'm a number two pencil!
Man! Now we can't make out!
Yeah, bummer!
I am the coolest person alive!
Are not!
Melvin! Molly! This is supposed to be TV-Y7! If you talk like that we'll have to up it to TV-PG!!
Oh, shut up, kitty!!
Merowwr!!
I wanna step on his tail, too!
I'm a her!!
Hi, Aher! Jump over the tape, okay boy?
*Sigh*
Burn the pencils...
Are too!
I'll toss him over!
Are not!
Put me down!
Oops! He hit the side of the tape! Is kitty okay?
No, call 911! I have a fractured rib!
I hate fractions... I can't add them.
911!!
Upsey-daysey!
I caught him! Kitty bounce!
Stop bouncing me on the tape!
His eyes are leaking!
Well cover them up! Seal 'em!
On the phone, Serena!
Okay! 911!!
These "Hare-less" wax strips will cover kitty's eyes!
No! Whew, I got away!
There's no answer!
Try not standing on the phone, idiot!
Oh, I know that, pyromaniac!
Just because I love fire and like to melt food and kitchen appliaces and strike matches does not make me a pyromaniac!
Come back kitty!
I'm healed! Thanks, Gemini6Ice!
Are too!
Are not!
Sailor Moon Says: I wish I were at Alan's concert...
Sailor Mars Says: I am not a pyromaniac! If you don't beleive me, I'll burn your house down!
Do a sincere Sailor Says, Serena!
*Sigh* Fine! Sailor Moon Says: 911 is for emergencies only! If it's not an emergency, but it's still a problem, call 1-800-97-JENNY instead!
You sure need to, Serena!
*Pbltpbltpblt*
|
|
| Originally aired: Saturday, July 26, 1997 |
| « Episodes 9-16 | Episodes 17-21 | » Season Finale | ||
|